Motivation and Prayer

Staying motivated is not easily done. Trying to motivate self is often difficult enough without actually doing what it is you're trying to get yourself to do. (It can also get as convoluted as some of my sentences - especially when one starts arguing with oneself about the whithertos and wherefores. (Whyfors? It's been too long. . . .))

I have a secret weapon for it now though. It's called - Zack. ;) :) Anything I know I should do and I don't want to do, but I really do want to do because I know I should? "Zack, I need you to tell me to..." whatever. Usually, the "whatever" is working out. Pretty soon, he'll text me back and say, "You should do it. Do it for" X reasons. He doesn't ever argue the point - No, "Do you really need to?" - just does what I asked him to. And then I do what he asked me to. Hehe. :) I like our system. Can you tell?

Motivation for other things is harder to come by. Things that you know you should do, and because they're more important you don't want anyone to know that part of you doesn't want to do them. Things where you're sinning if you don't do them. Take prayer, for example. I want to pray. I want all the good things that happen when I pray. I want to do right. But praying is hard, so I also don't want to pray.

Really? I'm going to tell someone that I don't want to pray? It's a pride thing, to be sure. I want to look better than I am. I don't want people to think poorly of me. But that's exactly what family is for - not just blood relatives, but spiritual relatives. They're not their to prey on your faults, and they're not there to hammer home your insecurities about being open about such faults. They're there to understand that we all need help, we all need motivation, and we all need accountability.

So I have trouble praying, and this person has trouble reading the Bible. It's not my place to judge and say, "I can't believe they don't read the Bible every day!" That'd be really loving, right? Totally. (Please note the sarcasm.) Loving is helping them - not in a patronizing, "I'm holier than thou" way. It's my job to try to do something to help them, to keep them motivated. Maybe to talk to them about what I read and what God showed me from it - to get them engaged and excited about it. And maybe they can help me figure out how to be more excited about praying, to view it properly - as a privilege, not a command to be obeyed; as a joy and a treasure, being able to speak to the One I should love most.

Writing is one of my ways of motivating me. I have to think about things, revise what I've written, reword - all the time meditating about whatever I'm writing about. What do you do? Do you have ways to motivate yourself? Do you read about the topic? Do you write? Do you do the dishes and meditate? Are there people you can go to and be open with?

As an aside, the weather here is amazing. :) The temperature on the bank said 51 this morning. It's blustery, cloudy, a little rainy and overall wonderful. I would love it if it stayed like this till winter. I doubt it will though. Predictions? I'm thinking it's going to be a warm fall, probably in November, but I'm not ruling out October. I'm hoping to have snow in December - lots of it. And January, too, of course. =) That IS why I'm getting married in January - for the snow. (Also, it's a good month.)

I'm getting married in January. :) Hehehehehehe. So cool.